Shipping Info

 

Because Great Shirts Deserve a Slightly Dramatic Entrance. We offer free standard economy shipping on all orders over $50. It’s our way of saying “thank you” — and also ensuring your package takes the scenic route to your doorstep. Expect delivery within 3–5 business days after processing (which usually takes 1–2 business days, depending on how much caffeine we've had). In other words: we’re not as fast as Amazon… but do they send shirts with sarcastic math jokes? We didn’t think so.

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Shipping under $50? You’ll see a flat shipping rate ($6) at checkout, which helps cover the cost of delivering shirt-based joy across the country.

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Expedited Shipping:

Not available yet. We’re working toward a future where you can pay a little extra to get your shirt so fast, it shows up before you even click “Place Order.” Until then, patience is a virtue — or at least an opportunity to check your tracking link 17 times a day like the rest of us.

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International Orders

We proudly ship beyond North America, too. Here's how our flat-rate international shipping breaks down:

• Orders under $50 → $12 flat shipping

• Orders $50–$75 → $6 shipping

• Orders over $75 → FREE, because you're awesome and we like you
  International delivery times may vary based on destination and postal service drama in your region, but we’ll send tracking info so you can obsessively refresh it just like the rest of us.

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In Summary:

• Free standard shipping on U.S. (& Canada) orders $50+

• Processing time: 1–2 business days

• Delivery time: 3–5 business days after that

• Expedited shipping: Coming soon-ish

• International? A bit more complicated, but doable​