OUR STORY
SUM Shirts was born the way all great things are — after too many beers at a Cubs game and one wildly specific shirt that said:
Mustaches + Scotch + Cigars + Bacon= AMERICAN
It wasn’t meant to start a brand, just to start conversations. But when people started complimenting it, photographing it, and one guy tried to buy it off my actual body, we realized we were onto something.
We make shirts for the people who speak fluent Puns + Math + Sarcasm + Nostalgia — the ones who know the exact scene when you say, “Stove? What kind of name is that anyway?” We believe in local pride, pop culture Easter eggs, and equations that make no sense on paper but make perfect sense on a soft cozy shirt. Every design is a wink to the clever, the snarky, and the slightly-too-online.
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Very First SUM + SHIRT
What makes us different? Our SUM-style math, of course — part formula, part fever dream. We specialize in shirts that celebrate hometowns, cult classics, inside jokes, and all the ways we survive adulthood (usually via snacks and passive aggression). Every shirt comes with a sarcastic blurb, because apparently we don’t know how to be serious. You're welcome.
Shipping is free over $50. Customer service is a real thing we care about. Professionalism? We'll circle back on that. For now, we're just here to add some fun into your life — one gloriously weird equation at a time.
Stay Snarky,
Anthony Wichtman
SUM + SHIRTS Founder
We make clever shirts.
You look clever wearing them.
Teamwork makes the math work.